I managed to run the vacuum, mop the floors, start the laundry, water the Bougainvillas, work on Sharon's necklace, watch 2-1/2 movies and sit on my butt. Oh, I got the dishes all done and the counters, toaster, coffee pot, microwave, stove, dishwasher and fridge cleaned off with 409. I like it when my house is clean.

I managed to go turn the movies back in, get some smokes, stop by Ted's house and Mom's. Fortunately, I got out. Unfortunately, all of the above is probably a 2-1/2 mile round trip. I'll get better, I know I will. I have to figure out how to see faster, broader progress. It doesn't look like they are going to approve my long-term and I don't know how I'm going to pay the bills if I can't leave the house.

Worst of all, I had an absolutely horrible thought today that just made my heart drop to the pit of my stomach. I may not be able to see Matthew off at the airport when he goes to see his dad. That would be the worst possible thing for me. I always drive him to the airport. We always hang out in the terminal. I always wait until his plane is out of sight. It's tradition. To think that I might not be able to do it this year is just killing me.

I've been searching for ways to work from home. I actually received something in the mail today from one of my inquiries. It's a program that pays you a set amount every week for labeling their postcards for their customers. It's contract so I wouldn't be on payroll. I'd have to pay my own taxes. I could deduct the work space off of my taxes for working from home. I'd be getting paid more than disability pays me. They guarantee a check every Tuesday morning. The only problem is that they want $82.00 registration fee to make sure that I won't get their materials and hang on to them. Where the hell do I get $82.00? How do I know it's really fool-proof and not another scam. I've run accross several scams over the years and I just can't take the chance that this could be one of them.

I've also got this lead on a job working for a realtor taking care of his correspondence via e-mail, phone and fax for his prospective clients looking to relocate to our area. I've got to call him tomorrow and see if he's filled the position yet. It isn't much, though. Just $7 and hour for about 15 hours of work. That just might pay for my phone bill. lol.

I just don't know what to do these days. I have a good day and start feeling positive about things then I stop for a moment and think aobut the horrible things that are occurring at the same time. To tell the truth, I'm exhausted just thinking about all of the possibilities.