I really need to get things back under my control. It's just really hard considering that on my good days I can get about a quarter of a mile from the house. I need to open a checking account at the bank up on the corner but I have to go all the way up to DMV and get my driver's license changed before I do. I never got it changed after my divorce and they are going to want to have ID with the correct name on it in order to open the account. Since I want to open the new account next Friday or Saturday, that gives me a whole week to practice getting up to DMV. God give me strength. I really need to do this so I can take care of my own banking again. I really don't like that she always knows what is in my account.

Matthew is grounded tomorrow. Why doesn't he learn that when I say to be home by a certain time that I mean it? He said that he & Casey wanted to go play with their new water rockets at the park. I told him that I was fixing dinner and that he had to be home in an hour. I even made him put his watch on and look at the time. He was almost an hour late getting back! Now he's mad at me because he's grounded. I'm not the bad guy here. He was the one that chose not to be home on time.

Another day gone. Hopefully tomorrow will be better. Scotty has to work from 1pm to 9pm tomorrow and he'll have my truck. I've only got one chance to try and get my movies turned back in at Blockbuster before he goes to work. Give me strength. I really need it to go that far that early in the day. Especially during lunch rush.

Peaceful thoughts, NO thinking about the panic attacks. I'll take some of my new CDs with me to take my mind off of things. Maybe if I play around with the tracks on the stereo in the car I won't be thinking about how long I'm actually sitting at a red light.

Pleeeaaaasssseee help me do this. I need to get past these stupid things.